Still Coping but will never let it beat me down

I am a 33 year old female who was diagnosed with HSV-2 about 6 months ago. That being said it has been a pretty devastating thing in my life. I have outbreaks at least once a month that last for about 2 weeks. I know exactly who gave it to me although they will NEVER admit it. But I think the fact that they never wanted to go get tested after I told them I was diagnosed was a clear sign of guilt to me.


Who does't want to go get tested after someone tells you they have been diagnosed?!?! Someone who already knows they have it in my book but neglected to tell me that before sleeping with me.

I do also take the responsibility in that I was careless and beat myself up constantly about it. When having an outbreak I get angry, depressed and am overall just tired. Having this disease is not only a hard thing to cope with mentally but it is also physically draining and painful. I am desperate to find something that will take away the month re-occurring outbreaks which are just a constant, constant reminder of everything.

I know people say it isn't the end of the world and that life will go on and I will find someone who will be accepting, but at this phase of the disease I am just trying to learn how to cope and accept which is very hard to do when you have to be dealing with it all the time.

I am a strong woman and am trying my hardest not to let this get the best of me and I am sure that over longer periods of time when the outbreaks become less frequent (I hope) that I will feel better about it and I will believe that I will find someone. I do know that this does NOT define who I am as a person, but it has changed my life significantly some for the good.

I was not given the choice to get this disease that was taken away from me, but I will never put someone else through that. No matter how afraid I am, I will always tell someone before I sleep with them my situation. That just means I need to make sure that that person is DESERVING and a really trust worthy person to know this very private thing about me. I am scared to death of being rejected and never finding someone but that doesn't mean I am going to give up. I am taking the time to accept myself which is first and foremost. If I don't accept this myself then how can anyone else.

Having Genital Herpes has had a huge impact on my life. I have changed but for the better for the most part. It has given me the strength to realize that I am a precious person and that the next person I am with has to be deserving of me. Men were a thing I used to gain self esteem, now I know that my self esteem needs to come from within me. I know that given more time that my self esteem will get better.

I am making healthier life decisions, smarter decisions about people and trusting people. It has really opened my eyes. I still have days especially when I am having an outbreak where I feel like I just don't want to deal anymore and want to crawl in a hole and stay there, but I also know that is no way to live my life. I want to have a family one day and I will not let this get in my way and get the best of me.

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Jun 10, 2015
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Education NEW
by: Anonymous

While efficiency and someone perfectly performing certain task does not and never mean that we do need rush essay discount code to follow that person and tries to become the same like that one. But we need to learn the goodness of them.

Aug 03, 2014
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Life goes on!
by: Bob

I have been living with it for Fifteen years. I, like yourself, wasn't told about it. Total shock! It devastated me for a long time. I have a commitment to myself. In every relationship I have been in since, I have always had The Talk! After having this for the length of time I have, I have learned to cope with it. I don't have much trouble with it. I'm happy, healthy, and living my dreams in spite of it. This thing doesn't change the wonderful person you are. If someone loves that wonderful person, things like this are just very small and insignificant. Keep being positive!


Jul 08, 2014
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This thing saved my life
by: Anonymous

I would like to say that this has been extremely difficult, to say the least. I have an unusual strain that if I don't take these "medicine" baths I created it will scar my body. That is so scary. It is super aggressive, and it feels it is trying to just "take" over my body.

For anyone out there with huge red welps popping up on your body I use a 1/4 tsp. of oregano, basil, rosemary, and thyme. Then I use 3-4 drops of rosewood oil and run a bath. To start off I use only hot water and I don't fill up the bath very much. I feel like the medicine is more potent this way. I then proceed to splash it all over, especially where there is any sign of an outbreak. When the water starts to cool I just keeping adding hot water. This really helps a lot, even for the less threatening bumps, that I get. This regimen is wonderful for your skin.

I have also been doing kind of the same thing in a shake I have been making, I use more oregano in the shakes though. About 3/4 tsp. Oh, I almost forgot I ground up my herbs with one of those stone things before I put them into the bath tub. Back to the shakes, put all your herbs, and some soy milk or frozen juice or whatever you like. I like to put my shake in the fridge 15 minutes before I drink it. I also purchased zots organic licorice root. This stuff is a life saver, just don't eat more than 3-4 grams of it per day, because the root has a substance in it that is a lot like sugar, but stronger. You don't want to be up all night. It's just like anything in life, moderation is the key.

Now, for my story.

This isn't my first battle with hsv 2. I contracted it 10 years ago, but it was very mild. The doctors prescribed one of those anti viral meds they love to give to people. Little did I know it can give you kidney disease. I was freaking out one day about the outbreaks NOT going away, and I overdosed on those stupid pills, and I ended up with more problems than hsv 2. I now have kidney disease.

So, when I met this guy who was nice enough to tell me he had HSV2, I shrugged it off because I thought I already had it, what is the big deal, I thought?, what they don't tell you is there are different strains, and some of them are nastier than others. So, here I am stuck with this situation. I have tried everything, but my kidneys aren't having any of it. They don't like the elderberry! echinacea! mushrooms. What's a girl to do?

You are probably wondering where my silver lining is... well it's in the simple things of life. I, like many of you sought acceptance and self esteem through men and sex. I thought it was my only worth. I wasn't happy unless some man was desiring me, and that is no way to live. I didn't want to get married and so there was no reason ( I thought) to wait to have sex. But I didn't respect myself enough to make sure the man I was giving myself to was worth it. I am not saying you should tell these men you are waiting for marriage or anything like that, cause trust me they will run screaming. Just tell them you want it to be special. If he loves you he will wait for you. It is hard, because sex is everywhere. I am not old fashioned, and I was pretty much a guy when it came to sex, but look where that got me. Men can be in real denial when it comes to things especially sex and disease. I KNOW men with active sexually transmitted diseases and they do absolutely nothing about it. Yeast infections of the mouth ( thrush) chlamydia,. the man who gave me herpes has never actively done annoying about it. Can you imagine? he has had this thing for 22 years, and never been to the doctor, never taken anything, because he is lazy and stupid. girls please get these guys tested before you sleep with them, and for god sakes don't be like me. use a CONDOM. I kept dating old men who can't use a condom because they have erectile dysfunction. I use to feel sorry for them, we'll, now I feel sorry for me for being such a sucker. the problem isn't that they have erectile dysfunction. the problem is it can be reversed with proper diet and exercise, and that they will sleep,with anything at any time, man or woman. At the cost of sounding bitter, I am not. I have finally woken up. society pushes sex as entertainment, and that is fine, all I can tell you is don't put yourself in the situation where you might have sex. men are sneaky, and good at what they do. Keep on you clothes, don't let them give you a foot rub, or oral sex. they are not trying to be generous I promise you. I am just grateful I didn't end up with that virus. In a weird way, this has helped me take back my life, I was a slave to sex ...a true sex addict. Right after that guy gave me herpes, this other guy came into my life. this man was very alluring, but I didn't have sex with him because I didn't want to give him hsv 2. We might have used a condom, we might not have. After that, I found out he is HIV positive. Pretty scary stuff. I thank my lucky stars, someone was looking out for me. I won't be having any more meaningless sex, and I can now break the shackles of sex addiction that has plagued me my whole life.

thank you


Jun 09, 2014
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LIVING
by: Anonymous

Hi...I read your story and can relate to much of what you shared. I am, however, in a good place of acceptance. I was diagnosed 1 year ago. My outbreaks were frequent and I, like you, found the outbreaks just seemed like constant reminders of having herpes. My Dr saw the emotional and psychological impact the frequent outbreaks were having on me and she suggested daily antivirals.

Since starting these two months ago I have not had an outbreak. I have a different view of herpes now because the meds have helped me see how manageable this nuisance really is. I, too, have made positive changes including diet, physical activity, limiting stress and ensuring I rest and slow down.

I plan to come off the meds in one year but if I need them I will not hesitate. I do not need the mental anguish or the pain of herpes and therefore I choose to do what I need to do to control the herpes and not let herpes control me. ;)


May 29, 2014
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I'm just afraid to tell someone I have herpes
by: Anonymous

I was with someone for 6 months after being with him for 4 months. I had an outbreak at first I thought it was a razor bumps but they wouldn't go away, so I called my doctor immediately. When he told me "did u hear of herpes? well it looks like herpes" my world just collapsed. I start crying.

I was just thinking that my life is over and I'm going to be alone till rest of my life. When I called my at the time boyfriend saying that he gave me herpes he start yelling that's impossible because he didn't have anything on his genital part. I know I was clean because I was tested 5 months before that and I haven't been with anyone since. Well he hang the phone on me when I told him we need to talk he just told me he don't want to talk about it.

So I just told him to get checked. He was ignoring my phone calls and text for a week. Until he texted me and wanted to meet up. He told me he feel embarrassed and he didn't wanted to see me. I know he gave it to me. I only told about it to my sister and my cousin which are very supportive. But I'm still waking up during the night crying or waking up in the morning depressed.


Apr 25, 2014
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Attitude is everything
by: Anonymous

Good for you. Having your positive attitude is a great start on having HSV and not letting it have you.


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