World Turned Upside Down

by Moral Support Needed
(Somewhere, Earth, Universe )

I have been in a relationship with a guy on and off for a year and a half. I asked him if he had slept with others so that way we both can get checked before getting back together. He said no. So, we got back together. Then, we broke up because our lives didn't align up neither did our goals. I wasn't really into men who do pot and drink because I love doing the outdoors and living my life outside of my living room on an every day basis.

I've just been diagnosed. It all started when I thought I had a yeast infection. I went to the doctor's twice...they both missed it. Then, I went to a gynecologist, she found it. I didn't cry at that instant, I think the shock was still settling in. Then, as she was leaving, I didn't cry again....because, I wept. I was so confused.

I told my mom who was in the waiting room. She didn't cry at all. I was so pissed. How could this happen to me? I literally only had three boyfriends and I know friends who get drunk and messed around with random people who don't have anything...or at least don't admit to it.

I guess, I'm trying to find peace with myself. I guess the last thing I need in college is breaking down and crying in the middle of class. My mom is a woman of many secrets because she is going to hold this one. I want to find happiness. I want to focus on the positive.

Currently, I just started taking BHT and L-Lysine. Yet, more sores popped up. I'm scared. I always used a condom with my boyfriend because I wasn't ready to welcome a life in the world anytime soon. Now, when I think of a family, I cry because I don't know if I will ever have one.

~ More support needed

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