I am 17 years old, and was diagnosed with HSV-2, just a day ago. I was tested 6 times before this last time, and was given a negative outcome each time. Until recently, I was OK with everything, and believed that this couldn't happen to me, but it has. It's a hard thing to wrap your head around, to understand how this could be possible. It's depressing, heart breaking, and most of all stressful.
At the age of 14, I was raped by my boyfriend at the time. I was still a virgin, and wasn't ready to take that step yet. I had let him know that, beforehand I wasn't ready to go that far, and had even told him RIGHT before he decided that he wasn't willing to wait.
Anyways, after I was diagnosed my doctor proceeded by saying that, they aren't sure how long I've actually been positive. That I could have in fact, been exposed my very first time ever having any sexual contact. That alone, broke my heart into a million pieces. I just cannot wrap my head around the thought of this actually being true, I've been with two people since being raped.
Honestly, we weren't always being safe, so it's tough to say whether or not I was in fact exposed at the time of rape, or if it was either of the two. I have informed both of them, and both deny ever having HSV, but have been supportive to the fact that I have been diagnosed.. I still haven't fully wrapped my head or gotten a grip on to this reality, but I am trying.
I've told only the people closest to me, and the two guys I was willingly sexually active with. I'm not sure how this will affect my future, but I am hoping for the best. I want a family later in life, but am not sure how to be safe while doing so.. If there is anyone who can help me get a grip onto this reality, I would definitely appreciate the support from a fellow HSV-positive friend.