Nineteen Years Old With Herpes and Positive Attitude

by Cherry
(United Kingdom)

I'm 19 years old and a few days ago I got told I had Herpes. My immediate reaction was that my current boyfriend had cheated on me and I really did feel like my life was over. When I learnt more about it I remembered that my ex boyfriend had many cold sores throughout our relationship and it was probably passed to me through oral sex.

I felt dirty, disgusted and ashamed when I found out. I have never been one to sleep around I had 3 sexual partners who at each time I was in a relationship with. I'm just coming towards the end of my first outbreak and it has been hell. The pain was so bad and I have been very upset about the whole ordeal.

When I found out I had Herpes, I went straight on the Internet and read a load of depressing stories that made me feel that my life was OVER! Three days ago I plucked up the courage to tell my boyfriend who was completely fine with it and more than understanding! I've realized now that it is not the end of the world by any means!

Okay so you have to be more careful now during sex but since when was that a bad thing? I used to think H was a filthy and disgusting disease that only promiscuous people had, but now I have it myself I realize how much of a bad stigma is attached to it. I understand at first it is a huge shock and very upsetting, but honestly people go through way worse in their lives.

There are people with AIDS out there! H is simply a skin condition that is now a part of your life and that's it. People get worried that potential partners won't accept them but why would
you want to be with someone like that anyway? Although it is very important to tell every sexual partner that you have H, it doesn't mean that you have to portray it in a huge scary light!

Explain the virus and explain to them their risks and then it is up to them whether they want to take the risk! I honestly did think it was the end of the world for me. I model, I have a great social life, I'm in university, etc! I thought all of this would be ruined but it will only ruin your life if YOU let it! Okay outbreaks are not nice of course but the more you stress the more outbreaks (OB) your likely to get!

Be healthy, maybe start a gym, take anti viral medication and multi vitamins and just generally make sure your immune system is at its best always. When/if you get another OB try not to get down about it because it WILL pass and you'll be back to your normal self in no time :) it doesn't matter who you are, think of all the celebrities that would have herpes? Everyone thinks they're alone but that's only because people keep it to themselves.

At first allow yourself to be a little bit down. It"s inevitable that you're going to be gutted but after a few days hold you head up and get ready to move on. You may read stories of people on the net that gave suicide thoughts and have been depressed for years but as much as I hate to say it.. it's self inflicted! There is no reason to feel like your life is over because of this! Okay it's annoying and you have to change your life style slightly but that's it! Don't let it affect your confidence or happiness :)

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Aug 04, 2014
by: Anonymous

Thank you for sharing I was just diagnosed today and had a break down. I had an OB about two months ago and I thought it was a pimple so I brushed it off then another one about three weeks after that. I called and made a doctors appt but by the time I got it the bump was gone so I canceled it. Today I went to the doc and right away she knew what it was. My bf and I broke up a week ago and I am dreading having the conversation with him after I get the results. He has had OB in the past but ignored them we thought it was friction burn being he got it after sex. Thanks so much for the possible attitude!

Aug 02, 2014
Thank you.
by: Anonymous

Thank you so much for this. Truly motivating. I was just diagnosed today after continuous testing. All of the things you explain about it being self inflicted is really true. It's really what you make it. And I am learning. Thank you for sharing.

May 05, 2014
Love your positive attitude
by: Anonymous

I'm so glad I visited this site. You are so right about keeping a positive attitude. I was diagnose a year ago right after the death of a loving relative.

I felt so devastated and spent many months in depression. The stress wasn't helping and I felt like my love life was over. The most important thing is to get educated and by accepting this new condition I became a new person.

Its very encouraging to know you are not alone, so many people are going through the same pain, its very scary at first, but in life everything goes on. Once you accept it you can feel in peace with yourself.

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