Herpes Hoax?

by N. W

Hello everyone. I'm new to this 😬 but I have some questions, concerns, worries and I would like to tell my story.

About a month me and my bf of five years broke up. In midst of that I was sexually involved with someone else after. I gave him oral sex unprotected but used a condom when we had vaginal sex. About two weeks after I experienced itching INSIDE my mouth, around my lips, and just feeling like I was having an allergic reaction.

I received a video from the guy I gave oral to and I saw a big flesh colored bump on his penis. I freaked out. Then I calmed down and thought nothing of it until I had 3 red bumps on the inside of my upper lip a couple days later after experiencing the itching. I was freaking out even more and I am so paranoid so when I looked up my symptoms and saw herpes - I was already planning my death bed. The bumps were not filled with anything, didn't crust over, bleed, nothing. They weren't painful. They were annoying because they were there.

A week later and they are no longer red and they are still here. I don't have the itching in or around my mouth anymore. I went to the doctor on Tuesday and I am now awaiting on my blood work. I'm already planning on how to live my life with Herpes. I'm positive I Have It. I don't plan on telling my ex because he is not exposed to it being we haven't been sexually active in months and I don't want him feeling sorry for me or feeling sorry about breaking up with me and pushing me into someone else's arms.

But should I tell him? Do I even have herpes if I didn't get a cold sore or a fever blister? Could it be canker sores? Also being that I have oral herpes can I still kiss people? Or give oral? Should I take pills everyday for my herpes? Or just live a more cautious life and take it only during outbreaks?

Thank you. These days waiting for my results is crucial and I am so nervous.

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