Do The Right Thing

by Eva
(Auckland, New Zealand)

I think I've been infected by my partner. Before having sex, I asked him if he had any STI, he said no and I believed him. However, I didn't know anything about Herpes. Later, I saw somewhere that "normal" people have no clue of what Herpes is or that they even have it. I saw healed sores on his mouth and neck but I thought that it was really nothing because I didn't know anything about Herpes and didn't suspect anything.

Later on, I felt a burning sensation whenever I urinate. I thought I had an infection. I actually thought that I could have some STI too. I went on some websites to know about STI symptoms and saw some pictures about Herpes. I started crying.

Herpes skin symptoms looked like what my partner had. For many days I felt ashamed, bad and dirty and couldn't stop crying. I thought that my life will never be the same again and even thought about suicide.

How could I tell my parents and my future partner? Most importantly, how could I live with this and forgive myself? I'm killing myself worrying but the only way to truly know if I'm infected is to do the blood test. I want to believe that this can just happen to anybody and it's not being dirty but just being sexually active.

I refuse to live unhappy and ashamed. I have no other symptoms yet but I don't want to wait for them to know. I decided to do the test and whatever the results are I will face them like a warrior queen!


Dear Eva,

Thank you for sharing your wonderful testimony with us! You're truly brave to take a blood test. Consulting with a doctor, getting a physical exam coupled with a blood test is the only way to effectively diagnose your condition.

It is definitely not the end of the world. Furthermore, you are not alone in this! If you ever need someone to talk to, why not head over the Herpes Support Group page? Talking to people helps with emotionally coping up with Herpes. You will find plenty of warm, friendly people with the same condition. Someday you could also pay it forward.



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