18 Years Old, in Pure Pain, Physically & Mentally...

by Ann

It hasn't been 24 hours yet since the doctor told me. I’m terrified, heartbroken and cold. I’m young, very young. 18 years old and I've barely scratched the surface of my life. And now I’m told this.

My boyfriend is being very supportive but just as or more confused as to how it happened. He's healthy and I've never truly had a problem. Although my visits to the doctor are not up to par with his I’m still in the dark as to whether I really have this. I suppose it's his denial getting to me. He keeps telling me "no no no" but I know I`m sick. You know that gut feeling, where you end up right? That's what I have and its probably the most painful feeling ever. It’s heartbreaking.

I don’t know how this has happened and unless my boyfriend comes back positive, I may not know. Nothing makes sense. My dreams have truly been crushed with the possible news. I’m scared; I can't stop crying and can't help but feel absolutely disgusted with myself. I've always been careful. But after reading all on this site and others, careful just doesn't seem like enough. . . Dreamed of joining the military, working at it for almost two years all through high school. It’s all come tumbling down.
Now I sit here and wait for the possible call confirming my worst fears. “if we call them you'll know, but if we don’t; don’t worry about it ".

That's what the doctor said to me while I laid there and cried myself into having a headache. I’m angry and scared all at once. I don’t like this. Not one bit!


Dear Ann:

Hang in there. Sorry for the delay putting your story up.

So how did the test go?

If you do get genital herpes, it’s not the end of the world. Even though there is no cure, it`s a minor skin condition and is completely treatable with medication.

There`s lots and lots of tips all over this website on how to live with this little virus.

You can find love. Have sex.

Even join the military. All of these things are not a big problem, you`ll just have to be honest with people and be careful sexually.



Comments for 18 Years Old, in Pure Pain, Physically & Mentally...

Average Rating starstarstarstarstar

Click here to add your own comments

Jan 02, 2013
Me too bud.
by: Anonymous

I was 17 when it happened. I'm a girl btw. I had never been in a serious relationship, in fact I thought I was gay. I was a virgin and had NEVER had sex. I had only fooled around only a couple times in my life. One night I had a little kick back and was drinking quite a bit. This really hot girl and I hooked up, but it was quick. I gave her oral and she fingered me pretty hard and that was it. A few weeks later I find out I have genital herpes. I was crushed. I mean I've never even had sex!! I never had a serious relationship.

How am I supposed to have one with this stupid shit. It's been a year and I've sort of learned to accept it. But I recently got with this guy and I really really really like him. We make out intensely and sort of foreplay but I want to go further and I fucking can't. How am I supposed to tell him. It's so fucking unfair. I don't deserve this shit. And I don't deserve to cry all the fucking tears I have. I'm a good person and this shit is so fucking stupid akdnsnsjsbxhdb

Sep 23, 2012
I can relate
by: Michele

Dear 18,

I hope that you have found relief and support since you posted your letter. While reading you letter it was a trip down memory lane. Although for me That memory (reality) occurred over 22 years ago. Since then I have had a successful career in the military, learned to separate my disease from my SELF. It is an illness like Diabetes, cancer, hypertension or depression. They are all illnesses have stigmas associated with them. But you have to treat them. Take your medicine and keep yourself healthy. Your life is not over! It took me years to separate myself from my virus. I had to learn and reassure myself that I have value. I have worth and I am still worthy of love and being loved. Get to know yourself. Get in tune with your body and you can have a safe, fulfilling, and responsible sex life.

Click here to add your own comments

Return to Herpes Advice Forum.