Dealing With Herpes Twice

by Alma
(California)

I was diagnosed with Herpes about 7 years ago. My ex husband has it. I cried for about 2 days when I found out. I felt that my life was over. I felt betrayed by my ex, how can the one person I trusted give me Herpes? After 6 years I left my ex, I started dating once again. I haven't had an outbreak since I found out. Nothing was too serious.


I met my boyfriend now. We haven't had sex, he deployed shortly after. I was trying to think of when i could tell him. I was truly scared that I was gonna lose him over this. I told him the other day, ready to face the possibility that I was gonna lose him. He understood that it was hard for me to tell him and he said that he loves me and he isn't going anywhere.

I was relieved that I wasn't going to lose him. But at the same time, I was reliving the same emotions that I had when I first found out. I once again, feel dirty and ashamed. I feel completely different. I know that this feeling will eventually go away, I just never thought I would feel this way again.


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Dear Alma,

That was brave and honest of you to talk to your partner about the condition. Already, we can see some signs of overcoming the emotions that come with knowing you have Herpes. It may take a lot of time to process this but everything gets better in time.

There is no need to feel dirty and ashamed. Herpes shouldn't control our lives or define who we are. You are a beautiful, smart and loving person, Alma.. no silly virus can take that away from you.

We have a lovely article on Living With Herpes that you might find helpful. Life is too short to be anything but happy. You can definitely still have an amazing and fulfilling life ahead.

Gary

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